Gone After November

Forgive us, dear reader(s), it’s been more than 2 years since our last post. HOLY CRAP THAT CAN’T BE RIGHT?!?! Wow. Yeeeesh, you guys. Yeeeeeeeeesh. Ok, now that that’s out of the way.

How perfect is it that as I sat down to write this post, Gone Till November by Wyclef came on. It seems so appropriate. Except it’s more like Gone After November. Sigh.

So, dear reader(s), I (I being A) am back to Twi-blog one last time before we lay our favorite film saga to rest. Sure, like an undead vamp, Twilight will live on via DVD, Blue-Ray, Kindels, iPads, Nooks…wow. Technology, am I right? Point being, today is the last time (presumably) that I can say “I’m going to see the new Twilight movie!” That sucks. It suuuuuuuuuucks. Remember when you read Breaking Dawn and you cried hysterically when you got to that last page. You know, the one with the words “The End” poignantly printed in bold, final black ink? That’s kind of how this feels. But symbolically.

It’s weird. After making Twilight my Twi-life for so long, it hasn’t hit me yet that this is the end. Granted, I haven’t been as active in the last couple years. (Obvs.) I got a full-time job writing and doing PR for a company which I won’t mention. But I will say that KStew is wearing our products in at least one of these pics. Possibly both.

Just because I haven’t been blogging doesn’t mean I haven’t been fan-girling. I still have all my posters lovingly hung around my apartment. (This could explain my single status.) I’ve adamantly defended the reconciliation of Robsten. (Don’t tell me he shouldn’t take her back or that it’s a publicity stunt. THEY ARE IN LOVE. DAMMIT. IN. LOVE.)

Anyhoozles, back to the point at hand. Today I will see Breaking Dawn Part 2. At 4pm. EST. Today will be my final “new Twilight movie”…until ABC Family inevitably makes a rom-com about Nessie and her new super-cute now-the-same-age-as-her-kinda-sorta-so-it’s-OK-by-Disney-standards boyfriend Jake (played by someone from the supporting cast of Camp Rock 7: The Jonas Brothers Aren’t in This One). Oh, and I think we all know in 5 years the CW will launch a new series called, like, “Forks”…the story of a town where something’s not quite right with that attractive Cullen family, the new girl in town is mysterious, clumsy and intriguing and it rains all the time. But they’ll throw in some new twist like Edward is also fresh out of juvie because he hit a homeless guy with his Volvo while hopped up on enough bath salts to think he’s invincible. But it wasn’t bath salts and he didn’t just think he’s invincible. He is. Because he’s a vampire. And that hobo was going to hurt an innocent elderly woman. Or something. Details are still being hammered out. But this might actually work…so it’s TM. Got that? TM. Legally binding. Dibbsies.

I have mixed feelings about today’s screening. First off, the second half of Breaking Dawn (excluding vampire sex) is like my least favorite thing. So many vampires. So many battle scenes. Weird stuff happens. And I’m not gonna lie, I still don’t quite understand a couple plot points (that hybrid kid from the Amazon…still foggy on the details of his age and maturation status). Plus, as I’ve mentioned THIS IS THE END, FOLKS. So while I’m excited for two hours with my favorite un-dead couple (spoiler?), I’m not looking forward to hours of what US Magazine called “jaw-droppingly violent” battle scenes and the forced farewell that will roll with credits. And this surprise ending that’s kept me off the Internet and Twitter since Thursday? I’m nervous, guys. Nervous. What are they gonna do?? Kill Bella? Kill Edward? Kill Jake?? Originally, I thought it would be some cute retrospective of scenes from the previous movies. Like Bella’s human memories flood back set to a Christina Perri song and we all cry and grin and hug strangers because we lived through all of this together. (I actually got goosebumps writing that…nerd alert.)

But now I think it’s going to be some kind of crazy plot twist that changes everything and makes me leave sad or angry or confused. More confused than I am about that Amazon kid’s age and maturation status. Seriously…anyone else have a hard time with that one?!?

The wondering is killing me, but the wait isn’t. To paraphrase the great Paula Cole, I WANNA wait. I don’t want this to be over. As weird as it may sound to non-Twi-hards, this is the end of an era.

So, until we meet again…or until Steph finishes Midnight Sun and we all converge on theaters to see the whole thing start over again from Edward’s POV…it’s been quite a ride, dear reader(s). Thanks for sharing it with us.

Here’s hoping the surprise ending is the worthy final bow our friends in Forks deserve. See you on the other side.

The End.

What’s up, Doc?

Soooooooo, we don’t know if you heard, but yesterday was kind of a big deal for Co-Creator A. Sure, sure, it started like any other day, meeting M for java and “work” at the coffee shop. Ignoring photos from the “Remember Me” set (we just can’t get behind the hype for that one). You know…the usual. Then, the phone rang and the voice on the other line said A might have a shot at a celebrity interview before her official coverage of the Twilight Convention in Atlanta next week (and by official we mean for an actual publication. And us. Natch.) The voice on the other end said she wasn’t sure who…Peter someone. The entire neighborhood probably heard A’s response: “FACINELLI?????!!!!!”

When going through the possibilities for interviews, he’d been the last we thought to agree. Afterall, an independent newspaper with a circulation of 80k certainly doesn’t compare to People Magazine or US Weekly. We figured we’d get that creepy Solomon Trimble who seems to think he played Sam Uley. Silly boy. 

But no, it was confirmed. It was to be Peter Facinelli! Carlisle Cullen himself would be calling A at home for a chat! The shakes set in. As did the heart palpitations. And the yelling (sorry, fellow coffee drinkers).

Knowing a celebrity is going to call your house, but not knowing at what time, is a nerve-jarring thing. Not wanting to answer a call “Carlisle, is that you??” and startle a telemarketer, A alerted everyone she knew NOT to call her land line for the duration of the afternoon. Then, at exactly 4:04 EST the call came in. His agent was on the line asking if he could patch A through to “Peter.” Yeah, no big.

(I wouldn’t admit this to many, what with being a seasoned journalist and all, but while his agent was figuring out just how to patch P-Fac in, I totally grabbed a bottle of vodka and took a giant swig. I was hoping it would cure my shakes.)

We will post the transcript of the conversation as soon as we know what the paper is using and what we can run. In the meantime, we’re going to revolutionize the Internet by posting THE SAME THING ON TWO SITES! Intrigued? Well you should be. You see, the one question A knew she would have to ask P-Fac was for a little help on our patented ATM Twilight Drinking Game. And he was very willing to help. Stay tuned…

AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Guess who we’re talking to on the phone today?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

 

Calling Dr. Cullen, Calling Dr. Cullen...