The New Moon Drinking Game

*WARNING: THIS GAME CONTAINS NEW MOON SPOILERS. STOP READING NOW IF YOU’VE BEEN LIVING UNDER A ROCK THE LAST THREE WEEKS AND HAVE YET TO SEE THE FILM*

We’ve been blog mum on New Moon for two reasons: 1. we want you guys to make your own decisions and not be swayed by how we at ATWIM feel (it’s the best freaking movie ever!!!…oops, I’ve said to much), and 2. we’ve been so busy seeing it over and over again that there really hasn’t been time to write. (Did I mention how freaking awesome it is?? Seriously. SERIOUSLY! Per-fection.)

However, it has come time to post what we like to tell ourselves is the most anticipated New Moon-related item to hit the net since the debut of that weird girlie Jacob doll: ladies and gentlemen, may we present you…THE NEW MOON DRINKING GAME.

Now, due to the popularity of The Twilight Drinking Game, this one is a little different. Word got out about us and our mad drinking game-making skills, so a few cast members contacted us to help with rules of their own. (Rob and Kristen called, but K just kind of stammered through some long-winded rule and Rob spent the whole phone chat being self-depricating so we had to drop their submissions.) Fortunately, our friends Peter Facinelli, Edi Gathegi and Jamie Campbell Bower were there to lend a hand…and help each and every one of you get good and sloshed. 

First, our rules. I, Co-Creator A, went to see New Moon (for the third time) by myself with notebook in hand to come up with these rules, for you, our loving readers. I’m pretty sure the few other people in the theater at 2PM on a Wednesday thought I was crazy. And I am. CRAZY FOR THE NEW MOON DRINKING GAME!

*NOTE: We cannot be held responsible for anyone who gets in trouble playing or attempting to play the New Moon drinking game. Also, if you’re going to get wasted at the movie theater, be sure to bring a designated driver. We recommend someone responsible like Angela Webber. A Mike Newton type is a little too much of a gamble.*

That said, here’s how the game is played. Add your favorite alcoholic beverage to your reasonably priced (ahem) movie theater soda and keep your cup close at hand. (Once the film is on DVD, the game gets a lot more convenient.) Whenever one of the following things happens, you MUST drink. Note: some variations are designed for hardcore drinking game players only. Feel free to make your own variations to avoid puking like a “marshmallow.”

DRINKING RULES:

1. This is a pre-film rule: drink for every preview of a film about letters that stars Amanda Seyfried. Seriously. You’ll be drunk before the opening credits. (Though there really aren’t opening credits, are there?)

2. Drink whenever someone takes a picture. Bella, Alice, Angela, etc.

3. Ok, now this one could mean you get dragged out of the theater on a stretcher, but give it a shot (no pun intended): drink everytime there’s plaid on screen. This is for every separate piece of plaid. For instance, in the cafeteria, Mike is wearing plaid, but so are a few of the extras in the background. Drink for each. (If you really want to get crazy, drink for the plaid curtains in Bella’s house.)

4. Drink when Edward gets out of the Volvo at school and walks towards Bella looking like something out of a wet dream. (Seriously, no matter how many times I see the movie, I gasp audibly when I see him.)

5. Drink every time Emmett says something so goofy it’s hot. Which is every time he speaks.

6. Drink every time a line from Twilight is repeated. For instance, when Alice says, “it’s time” or when Bella tells Charlie to be careful and he says, ” always am.”

7. Drink every time a line that’s so random, dated or dumb that it rivals “spider monkey” is uttered. ie: When Jake calls Bella “loca” or when Bella asks Emmett not to “hate the truck.” Or when Jess says “homeboy could have been a psycho.” Or when Jake says “age is just a number, baby.” You get the idea.

8. Drink when you get dizzy from the spinning in the scene where Bella’s lying on the forest floor. (Cause you know you do. I actually have to look away. Alcohol should help that.)

9. Drink when you see Sam come to save Bella in wolf form…because he looks like an animatronic Snuffleupagus. Moments later, drink again when Sam, Harry Clearwater and Jake exchange a silent look that rivals those on an episode of The Hills. 

10. Drink for Jessica’s amazing zombie rant. We heart Anna Kendrick. 

11. In the scene where Bella falls off the motorcycle drink two times: once when Jake does his fancy maneuver to get off his own bike and then when he shamelessly removes his shirt. You knew we were gonna say that one, didn’t you?

12. Drink when Mike Newton says “gotta get that pwotein in thew” in his baby talk voice. 

13. Drink for the Burger King product placement in the movie theater scene. 

14. (This is a good one!) Drink every time Bella cock teases Jake and they almost kiss. Such a tease, Bells!

15. Drink whenever the wolf pack makes their weird greeting noise. “Oooohheeeeee!”

16. Drink every time someone other than Bella drives her truck.

17. Drink whenever someone speaks a language that’s not English, but no translation is offered. (ie: Jacob or the Volturi.)

18. Drink during the amazingly funny, awkward and creepy elevator scene in Italy. Genius!

19. Whether you love it or hate it, drink for Alice’s Breaking Dawn premonition. (We love it!)

20. Drink for every Cullen that votes yes. 

Ok, now that you’re good and tipsy, it’s time for the celeb rules. We’ll start with Peter Facinelli (who also kindly offered us a Twilight Drinking Game rule—complete with Rob anticdote). Peter said: “For New Moon, every time you see Carlisle in a scarf, you can drink. That would be basically every scene I’m in.” (Editor’s note: we’re counting the dickie he wears when he’s with the Volturi.) 

Next, Jamie Campbell Bower, who, BTW, thought the game was a fantastic idea. We’re also pretty sure he’d play with us any day of the week. And drink us under the table. His rule was: “Every time Dakota Fanning does something incredibly frightening, which is just about every scene she is in.”

And finally, Edi Gathegi, who took this game very seriously. He even changed his rule five minutes after giving us his initial idea. Here’s how the conversation went down: “If the rule was for my character, you’d be sober the whole time, so how about every time Taylor is shirtless in a frame. Not in a scene, in a frame. So if they cut to Taylor, then cut to Kristen, then cut back to Taylor, drink both times [he’s on screen].” A few minutes later after hearing Jamie’s idea, Edi changed his mind:

Edi: Mine promotes alcoholism, I want to change it. How about every time someone is shirtless? Not in frames, just in scenes. Every time you see pecs.

Jamie: Nipple?

Edi: No, just pecs. Man cleave. And that’s for everyone. Not just Taylor. 

So, ATWIM readers, you heard the man. Drink every time you see man cleavage. And that includes Laurent’s under his blazer. We think Edi would want it that way.

Advertisements

6 Responses to “The New Moon Drinking Game”

  1. Can’t WAIT to play!!!!!

  2. Oh gosh. This list makes the movie all the more awesome. Well done, A.

  3. […] Awesome Twilight Musings « The New Moon Drinking Game […]

  4. My version of the New Moon drinking game… Take a shot every time a half naked man is on the screen… We’re playing tonight and I have a feeling i’m getting WASTED lol

  5. i like jacob because hes hott ang cute

  6. i seened the twilight saga the ecleps

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: