The Twi-itter People (Part 1)

It’s no secret that I, Co-Creator A, am a little crazy when it comes to Twilight. Yes, I have a giant Twilight movie poster hanging in my office. Yes, I have read the books at least 5 times each. Yes, my ultimate goal this year is to attend the convention and meet Emmett. Whatevs. Last week, while researching ‘The Twi-itter Wars (of the South)’ I came across a group of Twi-hards way crazier than myself. 

It should be mentioned that when I say crazy, I don’t mean it in a bad way. Not entirely anyway. Like I said, I’m pretty fanatical when it comes to my Twi-abetes, so to call the kettle black would make this pot a bit of a hypocrite. However, these fans are taking their obsessions WAY beyond anything I’ve ever done.

Remember back to simpler times. A time with no MySpace, no Facebook, no texting. When AOL was the hottest way to surf your 28.8k net and chat rooms were full of interesting people pretending to be celebrities (I still swear that girl I talked to in 1997 REALLY was Sarah Jessica Parker!). People would pseudo-converse in a pseudo-public forum and when their conversation needed to get a little more detailed, take it to an IM. Those who wanted to have detailed conversations with more than one person would go to private chats named  for oh-so-important topics, like singlefolksinAZ or ILuvSBTBthenewclass. The really intense ones would role play in their chat rooms. Wizards, knights, magicians, they all had their own private chats where they could really get down to the nitty gritty and talk as though they knew how to cast spells, save maidens and pull rabbits out of their virtual hats. We would read and we would laugh. What kind of person gets so crazy about fictional things that they pretend to be those fictional things online?

Enter the new private chat room: Twi-itter Role Players or TRPs. Like I said, I never meant to find this rare breed of Twi-hard. I was looking for celeb Twi-itter accounts and found Alice’s first. I laughed at the intense and questionably delusional things she tweeted to Jasper. For instance: *giggling, leaning down to kiss your neck* Gotcha! (FYI: When people use * to signify action, we start to worry. This is classic old-school AOL chat room behavior!) Anyway, I thought this stuff was fantastic (Co-Creator M was way more creeped out than I was. Doesn’t speak highly of me.) and immediately decided to follow all of them. Bella, Edward, Esme, Carlisle, Jacob, Emmett, Rose…they all have accounts! Even Renesmee has one!! It never ends!

Literally. They never shut up. Never! They’re always talking to each other. Always *doing some sort of action* or sending each other song lyrics. It’s the most intense thing I’ve ever seen! These people must not have jobs…which makes me think they’re like 16. That would make sense anyway, since that’s how old I was the last time I *said I was doing some sort of action*. But as crazy as they are, I can’t stop following them! Which means that you, lucky ATWIM reader(s), get two days of Twi-itter role playing stories! So stay tuned for tomorrow’s installment, which is full of deceit, back-stabbing, adultery and, wait for it, Twitter sex.

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