King of Vampires

If you’re anything like us (and we know you are), you spend more time defending your obsession with the Twilight books to non-believers than you do reminiscing about Bella and Jacob’s first kiss (for better or worse). Your roommate, your co-worker—hell, any boy for that matter—they just don’t understand how the written word could be so captivating that we hole up in our bedrooms reading for hours. (WTF! You don’t hear us questioning your subscription to Playboy!)

Well faithful ATM reader(s)/Twilighters, no longer will you have to defend, lie, or steal (unless, of course, you’re pirating the movie to play the ATM-patented Twilight Drinking Game ™ )in order to get your Twilight fix.  Our hometown hero (and we’re not talking about Pee Wee Herman) went on record to admit reading Twilight.   That’s right.  Stephen King, Mr. New York Times Best Selling Fiction Writer himself has endured the same Bella-Edward-Jacob-Mike-Jessica love rollercoaster that we have.  Who cares if he hated it. Just saying the words, ” Stephenie Meyer can’t write worth a darn,” means that he has personally read the book to make such a claim. *

Wow…stars really are like us!  He, like us, has curled up on the sofa late at night reading the book. Okay, so maybe he was wearing jeans that were a few inches too short (same hometown, remember? There are just some things we know here at ATM…that’s why we have our own blog.) and we looked hot wearing our fresh from the Outback new knitted knee-high Uggs while reading. But that’s beside the point.

If Stephen King can spend his days writing novels that scare the socks off you and his nights engulfed in Twilight, then why can’t we come home from work and share a bottle of wine with our fictional best friends, too? So to you boys that question our sanity every time we utter the words, “I sooo wish I was a vampire,” consider this:  while we’re off saving money for our boob job and bleaching our hair (Hef is still into blondes, right?), the least you could do is glue a little glitter to your face when we go outside. I mean…come on.

*Editors note:  While it is apparent that our loyalities lie with the Twighlight saga, it should be noted that in no way has our opinion of Mr. King swayed.  If someone would have asked us our opinion, we here at ATM, being the literary genuises that we are, would have agreed with Mr. King’s sentiments regarding Mrs. Meyers’ writing skills.  In fact, Co-Creator A has drafted an account of her average evening in the voice of Mrs. Meyers, proving that with a few key (and over used) phrases, anyone can sound like a best selling author.

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